“I CAN’T HEAR YOU!”

An old man decided his wife was getting hard of hearing. He called her doctor to make an appointment to have her hearing checked. 

The doctor’s office said they could see her in two weeks. They explained that, in the meantime, there was a simple, informal test the husband could do to give the doctor some idea of the dimensions of the problem.

The man was told, ”Here’s what you do. Start about 40 feet away from her, and speak in a normal conversational tone and see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response.”

So that evening the wife was in the kitchen cooking dinner, and the husband was in the living room.  He thought to himself, "I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens.”

"Honey, what's for supper?” he asked. There was no response.

So he moved to the other end of the room, about 30 feet away and asked again,  "Honey, what's for supper?" There was no response.

So he went into into the dining room, about 20 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?" Again, no response from his wife.

He then went to the kitchen door, only 10 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?" Still, no response!

So he then walked right up behind her and said, "Honey, what's for supper?”

"For the 5th time, CHICKEN!” she replied.

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“WILL I LIVE TO BE 80?”

Mrs. Jones had recently picked a new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he told her she was doing "fairly well" for her age. 

A little concerned about that comment, she couldn't resist asking him," Do you think I'll live to be 80?”

He asked, "Do you smoke tobacco or drink beer or wine?”

"Oh no," she replied. “I've never done drugs, either.”

Then he asked, "Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?”

She replied, ”Oh, my no! My previous doctor said that all red meat is very unhealthy.”

"Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, sailing, hiking, or bicycling?” asked the doctor

"No, I don't," she said.

He asked, "Do you gamble or drive fast cars?”

"No," she replied, "I don't do any of those things.”

He looked at her and said, "Then why do you want to live to be 80?”

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“I HAVE A QUESTION!”

An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen to visit. The two gentlemen, Joe and Harry, had a conversation in the living room. Joe says, “Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great! I would recommend it very highly.” 

Harry asks, “What is the name of the restaurant?”

Joe thinks and thinks and finally asks, “What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know... The one that's red and has thorns?”

“Do you mean a rose?” Harry asked.

“Yes, that's the one,” replied Joe.

He then turns towards the kitchen and yells, “Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?”

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In one of “God’s Other Ways”, He gives us laughter and humor!

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So teach us to number our days, that we may present to You a heart of wisdom. - Psalm 90:12

The glory of the young is their strength; the gray hair of experience is the splendor of the old. - Proverbs 20:29 NLT

I will be your God throughout your lifetime—until your hair is white with age. I made you, and I will care for you. I will carry you along and save you.  Isaiah 46:4 NLT

Now that I am old and gray, do not abandon me, O God. Let me proclaim your power to this new generation, your mighty miracles to all who come after me. Your Righteousness, O God, reaches to the highest heavens. You have done such wonderful things. Who can compare with you, O God? Psalm 71:18-19 NLT

Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom.  Psalm 90:12 NLT

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If you liked this story and would like a copy of either of my books,
they are available on Amazon in both paperback and Kindle format:

If you have a story or testimony that you think might bless others,
I invite you to send it by email to me (Kenneth Kersey) at godsotherways@me.com.

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